Andreya
@andreyasasylum.bsky.social
Cat lady. Lesbian. Not your señorita.
Enter at your own risk: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaabdhdjbnqpa
Enter at your own risk: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaabdhdjbnqpa
Pinned
Andreya
@andreyasasylum.bsky.social
· Jul 25
Talk to your doctor to see if shutting the fuck up is right for you.
Reposted by Andreya
DON'T TRY TO FORCE THE POSTS OR YOU'LL INFECT THE WHOLE AREA.
November 26, 2025 at 4:26 AM
DON'T TRY TO FORCE THE POSTS OR YOU'LL INFECT THE WHOLE AREA.
Reposted by Andreya
Licks bacon grease off phone screen. Continues posting.
November 23, 2025 at 12:43 PM
Licks bacon grease off phone screen. Continues posting.
Reposted by Andreya
What my company does is none of my business, just as what I do is none of theirs. (I'm self-employed)
November 26, 2025 at 10:54 AM
What my company does is none of my business, just as what I do is none of theirs. (I'm self-employed)
Reposted by Andreya
At a job it takes me 2 or 3 years to become curious about what the company actually does
March 29, 2024 at 12:49 PM
At a job it takes me 2 or 3 years to become curious about what the company actually does
Reposted by Andreya
Welcome to your 50s.
SNACKS!!! That’s it. That’s the thought.
SNACKS!!! That’s it. That’s the thought.
November 19, 2025 at 8:26 AM
Welcome to your 50s.
SNACKS!!! That’s it. That’s the thought.
SNACKS!!! That’s it. That’s the thought.
Reposted by Andreya
The feminine urge to burn every last splinter to the ground.
November 26, 2025 at 10:59 AM
The feminine urge to burn every last splinter to the ground.
Reposted by Andreya
Cute. You’re confusing loud angry and aggressive opinions with self-awareness. They’re not the same. Far from woke bro.
November 26, 2025 at 3:53 AM
Cute. You’re confusing loud angry and aggressive opinions with self-awareness. They’re not the same. Far from woke bro.
Reposted by Andreya
you utter fools you absolute twats you fuckers of mothers
I love you
I love you
November 25, 2025 at 3:47 AM
you utter fools you absolute twats you fuckers of mothers
I love you
I love you
Reposted by Andreya
can’t believe I’ve been online friends with some of you assholes for fifteen or more years
November 25, 2025 at 5:19 AM
can’t believe I’ve been online friends with some of you assholes for fifteen or more years
Reposted by Andreya
are you there god, it’s me…what? you’re not there bc you don’t exist? then who is this?
November 25, 2025 at 1:56 PM
are you there god, it’s me…what? you’re not there bc you don’t exist? then who is this?
Reposted by Andreya
i may never skeet a banger but at least i have a life. what? you post bangers, are an expert in your field, and have a healthy social life? ok, but have you ever opened a fun sized starburst wrapper and it had a red AND a pink piece?
November 25, 2025 at 2:09 AM
i may never skeet a banger but at least i have a life. what? you post bangers, are an expert in your field, and have a healthy social life? ok, but have you ever opened a fun sized starburst wrapper and it had a red AND a pink piece?
Reposted by Andreya
One thing about me no one ever tells me I deserve a rest
November 24, 2025 at 9:25 PM
One thing about me no one ever tells me I deserve a rest
Reposted by Andreya
The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
November 24, 2025 at 2:06 PM
The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
Reposted by Andreya
I wish Fonzie could just hit the U.S. and it would start working properly again.
November 24, 2025 at 8:38 PM
I wish Fonzie could just hit the U.S. and it would start working properly again.
Reposted by Andreya
Not foolish enough to ask how much worse it can get, but naive enough to imagine there must be a reprieve at some point
November 23, 2025 at 11:59 AM
Not foolish enough to ask how much worse it can get, but naive enough to imagine there must be a reprieve at some point
Reposted by Andreya
*exhales massive vape cloud*
We used to pay money to have someone else give a mutual a trophy emoji for a good tweet.
We used to pay money to have someone else give a mutual a trophy emoji for a good tweet.
November 25, 2025 at 4:07 AM
*exhales massive vape cloud*
We used to pay money to have someone else give a mutual a trophy emoji for a good tweet.
We used to pay money to have someone else give a mutual a trophy emoji for a good tweet.
Reposted by Andreya
I would like a redo..life.
November 24, 2025 at 7:34 PM
I would like a redo..life.
Reposted by Andreya
Getting my debris read today, I know it sounds kooky but it's less invasive than having my wreckage scoured and more accurate than mayday mayday in a box
November 24, 2025 at 5:00 PM
Getting my debris read today, I know it sounds kooky but it's less invasive than having my wreckage scoured and more accurate than mayday mayday in a box
Reposted by Andreya
JUDGE: How do you plead?
ME: Your Honor, I invoke my Third Amendment rights.
JUDGE: Don't you mean the Fifth Amendment?
ME: No, Your Honor, the Third. I don't want any soldiers quartered in my apartment. At least not until I get the chance to clean up. It's a mess.
ME: Your Honor, I invoke my Third Amendment rights.
JUDGE: Don't you mean the Fifth Amendment?
ME: No, Your Honor, the Third. I don't want any soldiers quartered in my apartment. At least not until I get the chance to clean up. It's a mess.
November 24, 2025 at 6:43 PM
JUDGE: How do you plead?
ME: Your Honor, I invoke my Third Amendment rights.
JUDGE: Don't you mean the Fifth Amendment?
ME: No, Your Honor, the Third. I don't want any soldiers quartered in my apartment. At least not until I get the chance to clean up. It's a mess.
ME: Your Honor, I invoke my Third Amendment rights.
JUDGE: Don't you mean the Fifth Amendment?
ME: No, Your Honor, the Third. I don't want any soldiers quartered in my apartment. At least not until I get the chance to clean up. It's a mess.
Reposted by Andreya
a recent local development that is contributing to my origin story is that there has been a cybertruck parked at one of my neighbor's houses for the last three days
November 24, 2025 at 6:43 PM
a recent local development that is contributing to my origin story is that there has been a cybertruck parked at one of my neighbor's houses for the last three days
I have such bad PeeTSD that every time my bed is the least bit cold, I’m terrified that it’s been peed in.
November 24, 2025 at 11:12 AM
I have such bad PeeTSD that every time my bed is the least bit cold, I’m terrified that it’s been peed in.
Reposted by Andreya
November 24, 2025 at 3:59 AM
Reposted by Andreya
Too many X accounts are bots. Delighted to be on Bluesky where you're all just figments of my imagination
November 24, 2025 at 7:22 AM
Too many X accounts are bots. Delighted to be on Bluesky where you're all just figments of my imagination
Reposted by Andreya
It's that time of year
November 22, 2025 at 11:54 AM
It's that time of year