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ghost crab

@crabbydaddy.bsky.social

2.2K followers 1.8K following 7.4K posts

CrabbyDaCrab from Twitter architect, divorced from reality, crabby while in season we have one race: human. be kind. 🏳️‍🌈

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ghost crab @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · May 26

Sometimes I feel as if we’re all Schrodinger's cat.

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Anni Jyn @annijyn.com · 18h

maybe i’m one meltdown away from figuring it all out

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ghost crab @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · 18h

i’m distinctly overestimatable

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trickyNOtreat 🎃 @trickykat.bsky.social · 21h

not bsky not mastodon but a secret third thing (cake)

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Tits McDick @titsmcdick.bsky.social · 18h

My retirement home is likely a cardboard box under a bridge.

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Miss Havishambles @misshavishambles.bsky.social · 1d

Never post in the middle of the night, or any other time.

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ash @ashhull.bsky.social · 18h

Don't underestimate me. I could do much worse.

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Miss Havishambles @misshavishambles.bsky.social · 1d

Hey Princess I can detect pee through ten mattresses too.

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Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 19h

“It’s not a competition”

- losers

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Careful, Jenn Bites 🧛🏻‍♀️🩷🧛🏻‍♀️ @alldolledup44.bsky.social · 18h

Just know, after you have children you will never have scotch tape in your house again.

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ghost crab @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · 20h

What matters is people. You’re a people that matters.

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Grant Tanaka @granttanaka.bsky.social · 20h

Taking a break for awhile to try to figure out if anything matters anymore. Please be good to each other and don't drink the stuff under the sink while I'm gone ok 🤙

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Corduroy Cheddar @corduroycheddar.bsky.social · 2d

Mature olive oils in your neighborhood looking for a hot salad

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captcha @dopeshow.bsky.social · 21h

I will never forgive you, guy who put a romaine lettuce heel on my cheeseburger

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ghost crab @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · 20h

i’m already fucking same not posting good 🤪

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trickyNOtreat 🎃 @trickykat.bsky.social · 22h

not gonna post good until the rest of you do the fucking same

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ghost crab @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · 20h

🤣

a remote control car is driving down a street next to a house .

ALT: a remote control car is driving down a street next to a house .

media.tenor.com

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ghost crab @crabbydaddy.bsky.social · 21h

i think i need more stop signs in my life as most of my problems stem from me not knowing when to

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Michelle @michelleroy78.bsky.social · 21h

I was walking around the house naked and one of my smoke detectors went off. so now it’s my favorite smoke detector.

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Jake_Vig @jakevig.bsky.social · 23h

Knowing when to stop is the least used talent.

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Canadian Bacon @tashaneedshelp.bsky.social · 1d

You’re obviously lying when you say that you wouldn’t use your laser eyes to reheat food.

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Boo B 👻🐝 @vtbee80.bsky.social · 23h

i need a forehead kiss and a sledgehammer to the face

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SpecialKimtamine™ 🚩🏴‍☠️🇮🇹🇺🇸 @lorazekim.bsky.social · 23h

It’s impossible to know which part of my life is the middle so I decided to have an ongoing crisis

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Network Sportsball Analyst @fakesportsceleb.bsky.social · 1d

The sexual tension in this chicken and rice casserole

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Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 1d

“Do you want me to be honest?” isn’t a question. It’s a warning.

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The Amytyville Horror @msfoxifurnasty.bsky.social · 22h

they should make doctor’s appointments that i am excited about

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