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honeybadgermel.bsky.social
Melicious
@honeybadgermel.bsky.social
Thinks too much, talks too little. Born a gold rush saloon owner in the age of technology. Go figure...

https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:suhdwtoqinxndxizjc27ulko/feed/aaakejkcgubai
Pinned
Apathy is so yesterday. Get with the times people.
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My work friend gave me some cans of wet food that her cats didn't like, so when I come home and start pulling a bunch of cans of food out of my pockets my cats will probably think I've turned to a life of crime
November 27, 2025 at 12:38 AM
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Rest assured, I’m gonna go back to thinking about cartoons and laughing.
November 27, 2025 at 12:34 AM
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Unpopular opinion: mine
November 25, 2025 at 2:40 PM
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speed dating but it’s just a scholastic book fair for adults
November 26, 2025 at 9:49 PM
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my childhood dog was named Turkey because when my mom and dad picked him up as a puppy he puked in the car and my dad called him a jive turkey but Thanksgiving was confusing because I'm sure as shit not gonna eat the dog mom wtf are you talking about
November 27, 2025 at 12:51 AM
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are you there god, it’s me…what? you’re not there bc you don’t exist? then who is this?
November 25, 2025 at 1:56 PM
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we’re all in the same insane asylum together
November 18, 2025 at 4:12 AM
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Remember the 80s, when all the hair on women's bodies permanently transferred itself to men's faces. It's been growing there ever since.
November 17, 2025 at 8:01 PM
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him: She was a nightmare

me:
November 20, 2025 at 3:51 AM
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What’s the Bluesky equivalent of politely smiling and nodding when you have no clue what anyone is talking about?
November 24, 2025 at 10:54 PM
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There are two types of people at Thanksgiving: those who think the "special" brownies are just extra fudgy, and those who are currently trying to listen to the color of the canned cranberry sauce.
November 26, 2025 at 5:16 PM
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Dilemma: I can only find one pair of reading glasses and I need reading glasses to fix my reading glasses.
November 26, 2025 at 3:10 PM
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Today I started the "no sweets 4 weeks" challenge which I will restart tomorrow.
October 24, 2025 at 6:08 PM
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One Venti lobotomy, please.
November 26, 2025 at 5:39 PM
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Carpenters are only in it for them shelves.
November 26, 2025 at 6:31 PM
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All I ask of you is that we hate the same things. We’ll walk side-by-side, hating things
January 31, 2025 at 9:51 PM
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imagine hating me and i'm just over here trying to shrink myself so i can live in a dollhouse
November 23, 2025 at 5:14 PM
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An American expresses gratitude for "life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."

A Canadian expresses gratitude that the pothole at the end of the driveway hasn't yet swallowed their car.
November 26, 2025 at 12:41 PM
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If your doctor’s handwriting could sing, it’d sound exactly like Eddie Vedder.
November 25, 2025 at 11:06 PM
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can’t teach an old dog to fish
November 25, 2025 at 11:07 PM
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So how long have you been in therapy <flirting>
November 25, 2025 at 4:36 AM
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Her: do you like The Beatles?
Me: Ellen or Rigby is my favorite song
November 25, 2025 at 3:04 PM
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calling the butterball hotline and asking them when will life get better
November 26, 2025 at 1:03 PM
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Just added "bifocal curious" to my dating profile
November 24, 2025 at 5:32 PM